Tony’s Classic Christmas Story - Over bloated

At this time of year we all have to be careful not to over indulge. Well we all aspire to that anyway, but in our youth of course we paid much less attention to our respective waistlines and overall health. Maybe I should not generalize, but it was certainly true in my case as I recall the Christmas of 1968.

This was the year that the world was in uproar with losses of Robert Kennedy and Martin Luther King, riots in France, the invasion of Czechoslovakia to beat down Dubceck, the turbulent Democratic Convention in Chicago, with many more incidents and advances in this year of social ferment. And so it was that I found myself at home that Christmas in Gravesend, Kent, visiting my parents during the university holidays. This was a time to join up with friends from school, recount new stories, play some rugby and generally have a great social time. One evening I visited the Miller’s Cottage, a local pub, and got into deep conversation on politics, religion, sex and lastly, but not least my passion of cars.

It was not on the first 3 subjects that I got in trouble, it was the last. I had driven to the Millers in a 1963 Austin A-35 Countryman for which I had borrowed 50 Pounds from my Aunt to purchase. It was my pride and joy. It performed with great economy and a surprising turn of speed, as well as having room for 4 passengers and more in the back on A Dunlop mattress. As the night went on at the Millers several pints were drunk, numerous arrows launched at the board, and the stories about cars got serious. I naively offered the opinion that my A-35 was a huge in improvement in the Austins produced to date, and that previous models were unimaginative and based on pre-war technology. My opposition at darts was nearly apoplectic at this observation, and proceeded to escort me outside into the lightly snowing and bitterly cold night to see his Austin A-90 Atlantic.

It truly was an amazing sight – an ebony black 3 eyed monster (parked under a dimly shining lamp post) which clearly dwarfed the A-35 in every respect. It was huge, full of American style chrome pieces, and bloated there was no other way to describe it. All the panels had been blown up from the inside, possibly by the amount of gas it used! The interior was plush by any standard and the curious white Bakelite switches that adorned the dash board reeked of class.

This monster was produced by Austin from 1948 to 1952, the A90 Atlantic was a misguided attempt to offer a car designed to appeal to American tastes. Not only was the body bloated, but the engine was a 2660 cc four banger which later found its way into the first versions of the Austin Healey.

So that Christmas, his was bigger than mine and I had to agree…..